Have self confidence in any situation.

Self confidence is a mental habit. Once you start using it, your self confidence builds more self confidence.

Confidence: A feeling of assurance, especially of self-assurance.

Confidence, or the lack of it, is a huge factor in peoples lives.  One of the most common questions people ask is how they can have more confidence.  What they are really asking is how they can have confidence at times when they do not. They feel that they could achieve what they want at those times if they felt confident.  Confidence is a resourceful state of mind, whereas feeling unconfident generally gets in the way of taking action and finding solutions.

Confident and unconfident are two sides of the same coin.

Like a coin, only one side at a time is evident.  Whenever un-confidence is felt, it indicates that confidence is present.  Ironically, when a person feels unconfident they are quite confident that they feel unconfident.  There are plenty of things they are confident about, that have brought them to the conclusion that they are unconfident about something.

To Feel Self Confidence: Stop thinking about what you can't do.  Focusing on what you are confident you can do, puts you into a confident and resourceful state of mind.

Confidence, self assurance, is perceived as a feeling.  The confident feeling and accompanying behavioral response are the same no matter what it is in reference to.  To feel and behave confidently, mentally make an inventory of what you are confident you can do.  Now confidently make a list of things you are confident you want to be able to do.  Focusing on what you are confident you can do, will assist you to begin confidently learning to do what you want to be able to do confidently.  You can be confident of that!

Secrets of the Most Successful College Students

College-admission letters go out this month, and most recipients (and their parents) will place great importance on which universities said yes and which said no. A growing body of evidence, however, suggests that the most significant thing about college is not where you go, but what you do once you get there. Historian and educator Ken Bain has written a book on this subject, What the Best College Students Do.  that draws a road map for how students can get the most out of college, no matter where they go.

As Bain details, there are three types of learners: surface, who do as little as possible to get by; strategic, who aim for top grades rather than true understanding; and deep learners, who leave college with a real, rich education. Bain then introduces us to a host of real-life deep learners: young and old, scientific and artistic, famous or still getting there. Although they each have their own insights, Bain identifies common patterns in their stories:

Pursue passion, not A’s. When he was in college, says the eminent astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson, he was “moved by curiosity, interest and fascination, not by making the highest scores on a test.” As an adult, he points out, “no one ever asks you what your grades were. Grades become irrelevant.” In his experience as a student and a professor, says Tyson, “ambition and innovation trump grades every time.”

Get comfortable with failure. When he was still a college student, comedian Stephen Colbert began working with an improvisational theater in Chicago. “That really opened me up in ways I hadn’t expected,” he tells Bain. “You must be O.K. with bombing. You have to love it.” Colbert adds, “Improvisation is a great educator when it comes to failing. There’s no way you are going to get it right every time.”

Make a personal connection to your studies. In her sophomore year in college, Eliza Noh, now a professor of Asian-American studies at California State University at Fullerton, took a class on power in society: who has it, how it’s used. “It really opened my eyes. For the first time in my life, I realized that learning could be about me and my interests, about who I was,” Noh tells Bain. “I didn’t just listen to lectures, but began to use my own experiences as a jumping-off point for asking questions and wanting to pursue certain concepts.”

Read and think actively. Dean Baker, one of the few economists to predict the economic collapse of 2008, became fascinated in college by the way economic forces shape people’s lives. His studies led him to reflect on “what he believed and why, integrating and questioning,” Bain notes. Baker says: ”I was always looking for arguments in something I read, and then pinpointing the evidence to see how it was used.”

Ask big questions. Jeff Hawkins, an engineer who created the first mobile computing device, organized his college studies around four profound questions he wanted to explore: Why does anything exist? Given that a universe does exist, why do we have the particular laws of physics that we do? Why do we have life, and what is its nature? And given that life exists, what’s the nature of intelligence? For many of the subjects he pursued, Bain notes, “there was no place to ‘look it up,’ no simple answer.”

Cultivate empathy for others. Reyna Grande, author of the novels Across a Hundred Mountains and Dancing with Butterflies, started writing seriously in her junior year in college. “Writing fiction taught Reyna to empathize with the people who populated her stories, an ability that she transferred to her life,” Bain notes: “As a writer, I have to understand what motivates a character, and I see other people as characters in the story of life,” Grande says. “When someone makes mistakes, I always look at what made them act the way they do.”

Set goals and make them real. Tia Fuller, who later became an accomplished saxophone player, began planning her future in college, envisioning the successful completion of her projects. ”I would keep focused on the light at the end of the tunnel, and what that accomplishment would mean,” she tells Bain. “That would help me develop a crystalized vision.”

Find a way to contribute. Joel Feinman, now a lawyer who provides legal services to the poor, was set on his career path by a book he read in college: The Massacre at El Mozote, an account of a 1981 slaughter of villagers in El Salvador. After writing and staging a campus play about the massacre, and traveling to El Salvador, Feinman “decided that I wanted to do something to help people and bring a little justice to the world.”

Rid Yourself of Procrastinating Ways in 2013

Can you afford the same procrastinating ways in 2013? Why aren’t you pursuing your dreams? At some point, we have all procrastinated, not wanting to move on an action. You say, “Now is not the right time.” Yet, you take no action. People have different motivations for taking action. Taking action means taking risk. Taking risk may cause you fear. This process creates self-doubt. Self-limiting beliefs are doubts that you create about your abilities. They cause you to feel inferior. You feel like you don’t deserve the best. You allow others to set your expectations. When you think like this, there is no way to win. You create negative ideas that you aren’t smart enough, pretty enough, talented enough, connected enough, creative enough, or powerful enough. “I can’t” becomes your motto. This article discusses how to overcome procrastination in 2013.

The Impending Landslide
With the current economic situation, people can afford to procrastinate on critical actions. Employment and sheer survival may be at stake. In August of 2013, America posted no job gains. This economic slump is historical since it’s the first time since World War II that the economy has shown precisely zero net job creation for a month. Retail, manufacturing, information services, and construction all lost jobs. With over 15 million people unemployed in America, individuals must be internally motivated.

Most people want to accomplish something in life. A new year could spark a new beginning; however, it gives most people time to make excuses for unfulfilled dreams.
The more you repeat these self-limiting thoughts, the more you become trapped in your ways. Remember the definition of insanity: “doing the same thing that you always do and expecting something different to happen.” That’s a crazy way for anyone to live. Some people get caught up in this vicious circle. For example, look at the vicious cycle of New Year’s resolutions. Are you one of these procrastinators?

Yet, the economic climate speaks against such procrastinating ways. Samuel Johnson said almost two centuries ago, “When a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, he concentrates his mind wonderfully.” You need to wake up. Procrastinators try to put off until tomorrow what they should do today. However, you can change and move in a new direction. The following suggestions are offered to overcome procrastinating habits:

1. Identify where the task is in terms of your priorities.
2. Create a motivation for taking action.
3. Develop a plan for seeing your task through.
4. Set a deadline for completion.
5. Break the activity down into smaller components.
6. Reward yourself after each task.


In 2013, individuals must rid themselves of negative habits that prevent their success. Therefore, a person can’t wait any longer to change his or her unproductive actions. Tomorrow is not promised to you. Now is the time for action. All it takes is a little act of courage on your part. Individuals need to stop waiting and move. One speaker said, “There’s a fork at the end of the road. What do you do? Take one.” You have now approached the busy highway of life. Can you afford to slip back into the same procrastinating ways of the past? The answer should be ‘no!’ Individuals can start today by ridding themselves of these procrastinating ways in 2013.

Know your personality

Most people mistakes physical attributes of an individual as his/her personality. They talk about a marvelous personality when they may just he referring to an individual’s stature fair complexion or chiseled features.
Well, if you thought that personality has anything to do with height, good looks, complexion or the physique of a person. It is time you re-think what you think you know. Any physical shortcomings can hardly influence of his personality traits such as superior character and behavior, and not by other mundane and frivolous considerations.

As per modern management concept, "personality is the BRAND IMAGE of an individual.”

It is simple made up of three broad aspects namely:

1.    Character

2.    Behavioral traits

3.    Attitude

Personality development is the improvement of behavioral traits such as communication skills, interpersonal relationships, attitude towards life and restoring our ethics. Character is the prerequisite to achieving a better individual personality. There are several behavioral scientists who argue that improving behavioral traits in a short-cut course of fifteen days to develop personality can effectively influence others and help win the race. But we must never forget that excellent behavioral traits such as communication skills, interpersonal relationships, higher order of motivational levels and excellent leadership qualities also fail miserably at the time of crisis if not based on solid character foundation.

Behavior is just the showcase of the larger inventory inside a person, i.e. character. If personality is developed on the solid based of values and ethics, it will last forever. Fake smiles and mannerisms are short-lived and do not help in improving one’s personality.

Good behavior and co-operation makes a man popular. As a result the possibilities of his progress and success increasingly multiply. The feeling of help and gratitude towards others not only adds to human qualities in a person but also increases his characteristic qualities.

Different people have different opinions about what makes a man’s personality complete. There are several behavioral scientist who have the view point that character does not form a part of personality, but Steven Covey, one of the all—time great authors and motivators says that the best of behavioral traits fail if they are not based on the solid foundation of character.

The person who wants to improve his personality has to have desire and determination ; he has to identify the direction for his goals to achieve it. Once all the above three steps are taken he has to dedicate himself to the task of achieving his goal. We need to develop personality traits that are very unique. Blindly following someone else who is successful will never take you in the direction right for you.

Enrich your personality with judging people correctly

To reach the highest pinnacle of success we must have the ability to judge people correctly. Sometime due to lack of understanding people correctly we are unable to give them their due treatment, which is not correct. We should try to understand people who come in our contact and should talk and behave with them accordingly. Respecting the wicked and ignoring the intelligent is not only harmful for our own self but it is also against human culture. If we want to become successful in life we must judge people. It has been emphasized in holy books that we must behave in a desired manner. We have the treasure of trust and respect, but we should not waste it on anyone who is not worthy of.

 Psychologists believe that many times we face failures in life because we are unable to judge people correctly. Generally we see that many opportunities slip from our hands simply because we are able to judge those people correctly who associated with us. The cause of many disputes is this that we fall to deal with people in proper way. A poet has tried to depict trust and intensity in relationships in this way-- Nobody will even shake hands with you If you embrace people without consideration It is a strange type of city maintain distance when you meet people.”

You should not open the reservoir of your trust on your friend or anyone else. As far as possible we should keep the important secrets of life to our own self. You never know at what point of time in life a friend may become a foe or may join hands with people who are plotting against you.

It is useless to believe and hope that everything that happens will be good. For this we have to exert and do necessary efforts. Nobody has the right to be happy unless and until he does his duties properly. God transforms a seed into tree but to sow it and water it is our responsibility. We should have a positive farsightedness in our decisions otherwise we will have to face failures on many fronts. Do not leave anything on fate; rather ensure proper completion of task by making preparations and organizing things properly. 

Nothing is going to work out if you blame fate, others or circumstances. Take decision after thoroughly giving attention to your personal matters. Consider all aspects of the given situation and weigh its pros and cons to enrich your personality.

In your personal matters only you can take right and reliable decision and everyone is capable of doing it, after all why will others be interested in your welfare?.

If we want to be truthful towards our own self and become better, then we will have to become trustworthy and we will also have to find such people for ourselves. It is desirable not to change your words, live up to your promises, and try to complete your work in given span of time. Believe in justice for all. Avoid favoritism. The most important sigh of a reliable man is his stability. We must take special care to develop our character and our capabilities. Your character will become more powerful if you have faith in yourself and you depend on your natural capabilities. In this way unworthy/undeserving people will become all the more inferior and unimportant for you. All the conspiracies will turn into ashes before your honest and impressive personality.

Keep in mind

• Through in spite of suffering from pangs of hunger a lion never feeds on other animal’s kill in the same way a self respecting person does not accept favors from other people even in most difficult time.
• It is very difficult to understand a cunning, foolish or misguided person.
• Anyone who is fearless and forgives others is the right person.
• A flower does not bloom for its own self, but for others, Let your flower like heart also bloom for others.
• Sleep wiser’ is a saying which means that we must learn something new every day. We should not be in the same condition when we go to bed as we were when we woke up.
• We all know that time in life is limited. Extra time can not be purchased. So we should neither waste our time nor anyone else.

Remember

If we allow doubt of the inner power to linger in our mind it clouds our spiritual vision and destroys our peace. When we doubt the reality of inner being, we lay the foundation for all misery and unhappiness. As long as we dwell in the outer, we cannot escape from limitations and imperfections. But the outer is a very small part of man. We all have the power of God within us. To disbelieve this is to cheat ourselves of or true heritage, it is better to believe in our higher nature. When we have faith in that we break the power of the lower nature.